I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
