just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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