RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
