I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
