i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Randomize
