no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
