You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
