Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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