Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I want to have your abortion
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
