Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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