i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
