so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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