That's intense
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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