apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
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