She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
