When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
