dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
