so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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