I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
