I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
