I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Randomize
