Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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