I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
