Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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