We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
