i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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