Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
