Where is the hickey?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
