come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
