I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
