saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
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