Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize
