I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
This is my gift to your gina
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
