Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I want to fling myself into the sun
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
