Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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