Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I just want nice things and good sex
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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