She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Just pee around me
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
