Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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