she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
