I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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