Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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