We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
