2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize