Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
