so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
