just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
