Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
