your parents love me but you hate me
I hate all girls vehemently.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
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