is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
