Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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