just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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