this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize
